The Art of Letting Go

Posted on November 02, 2015 by Tamara Donofrio | 1 Comment

Moving on!
Walk away with a sexy smile on your face...

Let's talk about letting go and moving forward. Please let's all keep moving forward!

One of my favorite quotes is this...
"You can spend days, months, years analyzing a situation. Or you can leave the pieces on the floor and move the fuck on!" Tupac

It's true, it's true! I'm living proof. I have seriously spent exorbitant amounts of time analyzing stuff that I never figured out. Obsessing over people who treated me like shit. I'm an obsessive person. I don't like to give up and I really want to figure shit out.

Let's back up! I have major abandonment issues. Beginning from a very early age, I saw loved ones just leave me, ignore me. So I basically did that most of my adult life. If you ignored me, withheld love and affection, blew me off...I was hooked! That's what love felt like to me!!!

Oh gosh, even typing that makes me shudder and honestly makes me ill. Although, it feels really amazing to have that behind me.

So how did I do it? You have to start letting people in. Allow yourself to be truly seen - flaws and all! When you do this something amazing happens. You get vulnerability in return. People open up to you and share themselves. You connect as humans - not just going through the motions.
However, I run into people professionally and socially who simply can't get there. In the past, I would take this personally and consider it my quest for them to SEE me. But, you can only give of yourself so much. You have to realize some people will always be afraid, will always push away love and will continue to disconnect to remain 'safe'.
This is when you just have to walk away. Wish them well and always be kind. Realize there is no room in a healthy life for individuals who refuse to connect. Let them go...

It is very challenging if you're used to attracting those who withhold emotion. Keep saying to yourself, "Does this make me happy?" "Is this what I want?" "Does this feel good?"
Remember, love doesn't hurt, it feels good.

Just like anything new, it must be learned. its a behavioral change that comes natural with practice and time.

Start today with baby steps. Who's loving, supportive and kind to you? Go there...go where the love is!

Now go be amazing!


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1 Response

JD
JD

November 19, 2016

It is so true…we seem to be drawn towards the dysfunctional relationship patterns that we learned to “survive” early in life. But once we taste real authenticity, there is no turning back – thank God! Great post – thank you for sharing!

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